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Are you an away or towards person?

 

I was quick to pick this up when a client said this to me today:

“I need to make sure I keep moving away from failure”

Whilst this sounds like a perfectly normal and positive thing to say, to my psychologist ears, it tells me something different.

There’s a big difference between moving towards something positive or away from something uncomfortable.

It’s the same difference between describing a glass as half empty or half full. It makes a difference to how you feel; are you always on the run, fearful of something catching up with you, or focusing on getting to your goal.

Try out both of those things in your mind and you’ll see for yourself how different they feel.

If it’s anxiety you’re trying to leave behind, think about how you’ll feel when you’re not anxious anymore. What would describe this for you, would it be something like:

“I’m moving towards feeling calm and in-control?”

Find your words and repeat them to yourself as often as you can. Let me know what difference you notice.

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